Wednesday, October 12, 2011

What's in a Daddy???!!!

How does it feel to be a Dad??? The dads and the soon-to-be-dads among the readers, please tell me. I've always wondered what makes him so special? What does it take to be a good father?

For long we have heard the cliched lines, repeated an zillion times by our soap operas and cheesy films, "I carried you for nine months in my womb!!!!" But why is it that still for a little kid, his/her daddy is the Special One. Why is that the child is intrigued by his varied emotions - care, anger, compassion, love....

Just today, my sister was telling me how my little nephew, who is barely 10 months, is crazy about his dad. He is all he needs, she said. He just goes hyper at the sight of his daddy at the door. What is so special about fathers that even a 10 month old baby can recognise? Is it the strong arms that he knows for sure would catch him on his way back after being throw in the air? How else can you describe it, when a child (or anyone else for the matter), whose basic response to a free fall would be fear and panic, manages to remain oblivious and shriek in excitement at the fall?

"Mere Paas Maa He!!" A line immortalised by Sashi Kapoor in the 1975 Amitabh thriller Deewar still rings in our head at random. True. There can never be a more biological and emotional attachment to another person but mom. She is the secret weapon - you want something, you get it through her! Sacrificing, caring, loving, benevolent, she is a billion things at a single moment. But you have to accept it, 23 of those chromosomes in each cell belongs to us!

Not many mother's would agree to this, but the daddy is indeed the Special One. We might not have carried the kids for nine months ( sorry, it wasn't decided by us or by choice; it was nature's universal law!!!), we might not have suffered pain or pushed hard, we might not have changed diapers, we might not have put up with the kids' tantrums through their growing years, but the fact remains that the daddy is always a man of placed by the kids on a higher pedestal. For the child, he is one who cannot fail; he is strong enough to protect him from any harm, he would scold you, beat you but he is still the Daddy.

The other day, I was paying an evening visit to one of my colleagues who had just returned after her maternity leave. I was chatting to her husband and he was telling me how hard it was to be a father. All those sleepless nights, the crying, the lullabies. He was exhausted and had dark circles around his eyes. My friend calls out from the kitchen "Excuse me, but what about me, uh?".

"Oh please. You have to go to the beauty parlour and I'm left with the baby alone?" And he turns to me and says, " Know what. Never marry! I baby sat for 5 hours while she had her pedicures, manicures, bleach etc etc.... "

And even before he could complete, she stormed out of the kitchen in an apron, a spatula in one hand and states, "You don't BABY-SIT your kids; it's called PARENTING!!!"

Poor guy, he ate his dinner in utter silence that day, I heard!!!

So, we are back at the same old question. Oh no, its not the "Have I Made It Large" question. It is the caption itself- What's in a Daddy? I don't know. Maybe, I'll know the answer. Maybe some day, when I throw my baby girl (Yes, a baby girl) in the air and see the joy and excitement in her eyes as she giggles on her way down, it would strike upon me. Till then, and ever so after, daddies will always remain the Special One. Oh and, I LOVE U MOM. LOVE U LOTS!!!